His fingers, skinny tendrils, sentient in the dark, entwine his lover’s fleshy trunk, endowing another body with fresh intensities of sensation. These blossoms of the night are shrouded in the black cloak of sightlessness. The moon turns her dark side on their sensuous world, while the lovers skinny dip in bottomless amniotic pools. |
Author's Comments
A response to prompt 15 on the list of 31 prompts compiled by
 The prompt: skinny Comments
 This is very calming. I don't understand it, but I think I can sleep now.
 -- WARNING Big SilverSun PickUps fan~ Writer! Bookworm!! Weirdo Uses  too muchTextaholic Major Chess player Short Tempered Doodles in class Smart Aleck (most of the time) Perfectionest Hates her her art = Emmi. So hi.  This is the best thing I have read today.
His fingers, skinny tendrils, sentient in the dark, This image is beautiful, I like the organic nature implied by "tendrils" and the use of the word "sentient." entwine his lover’s fleshy trunk, endowing another body with fresh intensities of sensation. I especially enjoy the idea of "endowing another body". It becomes more of a gift. It's fresh and unique language. The moon turns her dark side on their sensuous world, while the lovers skinny dip in bottomless amniotic pools. I love this. The sense of excitement, thrill, vulnerability (implied by the nakedness) comes across clearly, but also a darkness represented by the moon turning "her dark side on their sensuous world," - it feels like their world has become private or insular, and due to the "amniotic pools" reference somehow spiritual and surreal. It's really my pleasure. I think you're a great poet.
 His fingers, skinny tendrils,
sentient in the dark, entwine his lover’s fleshy trunk splendid -- one half of ~ZombiesAteUs  after reading the previous comments, i cant give my opinion without being repetitive . . .but this is great!
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Critiques
Every word is precise and deliberate, contributing to the overall imagery and somewhat dark romanticism, quenching the tongue and lips with rich language and fat descriptions. This poem is definitely opulent.
One of the highest qualities of it is the mutual nurturing words, the way each word complements the other. For example - intensities of sensation, which wouldn’t feel the same without the word fresh. Or the wonderful bottomless amniotic pools. This poem is filled with little amazing couples, phrases, enchantments.
This poem made me feel.
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